4th Birthday Parties

Wednesday has passed and gone, and with it my baby boy's birthday. He is now officially four years old. It makes me happy and yet sad at the same time. Time just flies by! While I love seeing him grow and learn and transform into the little boy he is, I also want to wrap him back up in a baby blanket and have him coo at me within the safety of my nestled arms. LOL

We were wanting to do a really big shindig for his birthday inviting friends, family, and his school friends. HOWEVER, last year for his birthday we did that and it didn't end in very good results. Needless to say a house full of three year old's running amok resulted in a broken vase, puke on the floor, and a toilet stopped up with hot wheels cars. Not to mention one kid actually pooped on our kitchen floor and his mother ended up slipping on it in her rush to try to whisk him to the restroom. It resulted in a sprained tailbone for her and a very messy outfit. The house was so packed with people the kids were getting overwhelmed, and due to one of his presents getting broken Lucas ended up crying in his room that he wanted everyone to go home. He didn't even eat a piece of cake last year.
After that huge debacle, we decided to keep things low key this year. He had a Transformers themed birthday party which he was over the moon about. We only invited family and his little cousins, and it went without a hitch. The only downfall was the place we ordered his birthday cake from got it wrong and there wasn't enough time to have it corrected. We let him pick out his own cake this year, and they didn't make the right one. It was still Transformers though so he still liked it. Next year though I will either go with a different bakery or I will make it myself. He ended up having a great time anyway, he ate two pieces of cake, and nothing got broken. By the end of the day he was so tired he went to bed wearing new transformers pajamas, holding some of his gifts, one including a stuffed horse we got him since he is fascinated by the Harry The Helpful Horse book from Nick Jr's. Little Bill. I would have loved to have invited fellow friends with children he could play with, but I just don't think he is ready for that yet. He does awesome in school, but that is a more stern, sit-down environment. He does awesome when we take him to a kids play area like Chuck-E-Cheese because he knows he can just cut loose, but when everyone is crammed in a tiny space and running amok he tends to shy away from everyone.
I do think he will adjust in his own time though, and as he gets older I think a bigger party would hold more fun for him. Right now though I am just gonna stick with low key parties. Every child is different after all.

I am curious to hear others views on the whole birthday party topic. What age do you think it acceptable to have a big party for your child? Or do you start out with big parties at a young age? How do your kids do? Has any of your children went through a shy phase?